By mid life we all think we must be mature. After all, we have decades behind us! However, we are not all mature for our age. Here are some ideas about what maturity looks like in the mid life range:

Having the ability to benefit from experience is mature. In personal and professional relationships, its knowing the buttons that get pushed easily and knowing how to manage these hot buttons. Being able to reflect on something that used to make you fly through the ceiling and now being able to say “I know why this bothers me, and I am not going to react like I used to. Instead, I am going to respond with thought and care.”

Maturity in mid life also means being selective about priorities, relationships and how you spend your time. The ability to focus your time and energy around people and activities that are rewarding and gently moving away from those people and things that are not. Being able to focus more on experiences and other people as sources of meaning and pleasure rather than things is a great sign of maturity. Finally seeing setbacks as opportunities for growth and change versus a trigger for despair and depression is a great sign of maturity in the middle of your life span.